been living recently
by the question i posed in my last post
living my life by these ideas
honors myself

i surround myself
with people who
can show
they care about me
who listen
who take an interest
who can talk about things
when the going gets tough
who respect themselves
and then extend
that respect to those
in their lives

have no patience anymore
for all the self-absorbed
cynics, people who have
given up on life and feel
it is working against them.
been around that my whole life.
it is sad.  life is hard
i know.  but it is no longer
my job to fight someone else's
battle to change their opinion
i was so worried
about how others would react
when they realized i'm
changing.
and now
i think i don't care so much
anymore.
the implication is not
that i am better than them
rather that i just want to live
in a different way
because that way fits me better

so i only spend time
with those i really love
and care about
friendships built over time
effort
trials
ups
downs
love
compassion
laughter
jewels of life

there is a way to be good again
but the sidewalk only appears
underneath your foot when you
take a step and extend yourself
even against
the monsters that scare you
the fear that there is something
out there in the unknown
the darkness
that paralyzes you

i don't know if the universe
cares so much about
the specific action you take
i think rather it cares
about the underlying message
of taking an action

"Although facing the truth is not attractive at
first, the longer one follows it the sweeter it
becomes." ~ Rumi